I also enjoy keeping most of these relationships separate and I don't appreciate when they mix. Especially when they take it upon themselves to amalgamate.
I usually don't have many gay friends. With everything I went through the last eight years with The Mistake Whose Name I shall NEVER Repeat, I've learned the importance of surrounding myself with positive influences. Of maintaining my friendships. After the mistakes I made in jumping into a relationship with Matt I was a. unsure of, and b. not ready for; I'm wary of the friendship we're trying to build from the ruins of our being together. Unfortunately he's somehow incorporated himself in other aspects of my life. I can't help but notice how attentive he becomes anytime I'm communicating with Dante in his presence. So far his bag of tricks have including:
- talking loudly and inappropriately in order to make his presence known
- flashing me
What was interesting is how much attention Abe was paying me. He asked me out again. Said he'll pick me up friday for the movies. I acted completely uninterested, which only made him more interested.
Not sure if I'm interested. There's still Dante. I seem to find myself thinking about Dante a lot lately. I like him. He likes me. But we both agreed to take it slow. We're still in the getting to know one another stage. I'm not sure if he's dating anyone else and since we're not really being sexually active (mostly due to my issues in dealing with the incident) I don't really have any reason to ask him. Of course I know guys are interested in him, maybe as much as they're interested in me. He told me the other day he didn't understand my friendship with Matt. I explained Matt was there for me during a time when I didn't have many people to turn to. He pulled me outta a black hole. I already owe him for that plus my added guilt over the way I treated him while we were together. Truth is, I like Matt. Even if it didn't work out between us. He's someone I think I want in my life. There are the similarities I can't help but to see between him and The Mistake. But as Dante pointed out recently with the similarities he can't help notice between me and his ex, you can't judge others for the mistakes of someone else.
I don't know. Maybe I need to enjoy being single for awhile. Learn to appreciate being in my own company before I try to take on the happiness of someone else.
Boo, gotta get ready. Gotta hot date with Dante in a bit. Duece, bitches.